


The way it goes

by sarchengsey



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians
Genre: I don't even know / I tried / next chapter will be up soon, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-18
Updated: 2017-01-31
Packaged: 2018-09-18 06:56:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,101
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9373151
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sarchengsey/pseuds/sarchengsey
Summary: Jason remembered the day he told Percy he didn't like girls, remembered the sweet innocence of the room. (Sorry I suck at summaries, it's a fluffy Jercy Mortal A.U. Next chapter up soon :) please read and review.)





	1. Part One

**Author's Note:**

> Young and uncontrollable,  
> Dancing in the stars,  
> Immortal,  
> She will come, they tell me,  
> But what if I don't want her to?

The room was the kind of dark that you could feel, the lonely feeling in your chest, the heavy pounding in your ears. The sticky feeling of your skin.

But it didn't feel bad, it felt like lightning bolts dancing in your chest, and a nervous heart pounding in excitement.

Percy wasn't alone either, he wasn't able to feel the black creeping into his heart, or the fear etching across his bones. Jason was there, to protect, to save.

They were sitting too close, closer than friends would. But they didn't think anything of it, still to young to feel the sparks flying. Only twelve, still dancing and unafraid of being themselves.

Jason's voice was a bit hoarse from the earlier play, the screaming and wrestling the laughing and poking.

"Percy is it okay if I tell you a secret?" They had been best friends for as long as Percy could remember but the words still caught him off guard; Jason wasn't one to be sharing secrets so easily.

He remembered Grover's funny laughing voice ringing in his ears over and over again, the same warning every time, 'Secrets come with a price Perce, just make sure you're ready to pay it when the time comes.'

He took a low shallow breath and looked over at the blond. Jason was sitting cross legged in the beanbag chair pulled way close to Percy's own baggy chair. His new glasses were practically translucent in the dark, His hair, which was usually perfectly combed back, was messy from the play fighting.

"Yes." Percy meant to say it louder but it came out as a mere whisper.

Jason looked over at him meticulously, avoiding his eyes and instead searched his demeanor.

Jason didn't have the easiest time in school, but he was street smarts if anything. And he could call a lie from a mile away.

Percy wasn't scared though, he was telling the truth, Jason could tell him any secret and it wouldn't leave his lips.

"I don't think I like girls." Jason said at length. He was shaking slightly, clearly afraid of the others reaction to his confession.

He lifted a hand to his glasses and pulled them off and began cleaning them on his light purple shirt, it was an easy reason not to look at Percy.

"What? I don't get it. You don't like girls? But... Do you get crushes?"

"No. That's the thing Perce, I don't like girls at all," He paused for a moment putting his glasses back on, "At least I don't think I do."

"So your never going to get married? Or have a girlfriend?"

"Yeah I guess not. Is that okay?" Jason finally looked up at his best friend.

Pressure was building in his chest, he didn't exactly understand why he needed Percy to know and to accept it but he just had to. His stomach churned and his eyes filled with tears.

Percy's black hair was a mess as normal and Jason just wanted to take it all back and wrestle again. Just forget he said anything just be normal again. He wanted to feel Percy's hands on his own again, even if it was just for a moment.

"I'm sorry." He whimpered sniffing back a sob, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean it I'm kidding."

"Jason," Percy reached out for his friend, but Jason just flinched away, "I think it's fine. If you don't like girls that's okay. I'm sure you'll grow out of it."

That didn't help Jason's heart to stop pounding, or his mind to stop wasting time spinning in circles. But it was enough.

It was an acceptance of sorts.

And it really should have made him feel better, he thought, someone understood and had hope that he'd grow out of it.

"I hope so." He answered staring into free space, he didn't have the strength to look at Percy again, he didn't know what would happen if he did but it wouldn't be good.

So he stared off and let the room descend into a silence so heartbreaking it brought the tears back to his eyes.

He blinked them away and pinched his thigh hard enough to steel himself again.

But as Percy fell asleep on the floor beside him, his mind raced and he ended up crying again, just wishing he hadn't said a thing, wishing this rock hard feeling would leave his chest. Wishing he didn't catch himself staring at his best friend.

Hoping someday he could fantasize about a girl, he tried forcing himself to think of the girls in his class, Reyna and Piper and all their friends, but it just made him sick to his stomach.

Eventually his over active mind led him to sleep and he fell into the dark hand inches away from Percy's not quiet willing to take it away.


	2. Part Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> RoJA2015 I promise I won't kill them *.^  
> __  
> Beware Beware  
> Be skeptical  
> Ruin runs my veins  
> and my heart beats on lies  
> beware beware  
> I'll break my own heart before yours

Part Two:

They were thirteen when the lights went out.

The basement of Jason's house should have been scary, but the boys were to busy talking to be scared of anything.

Percy was wasting away time piling homework in a tumbling tower while chatting away, and Jason was sitting by his side cleaning his glasses.

"And she has the most mesmerizing grey eyes. It's terrifying! He looks at you and you kinda wanna disappear before she stabs you but you also kinda want to know why she looks at you like that? So then I ended up standing in the hall like a doof spluttering about her eyes. In front of like everyone." He growled annoyingly and pushed over his tower.

Jason hummed in response, and Percy kept rattling on about Annabeth Chase his newest fascination.

Jason knew about her, she was the smart blonde that failed class because she spent it creating random blueprints.

He had noticed her, tried to think about her, somehow get a crush on her. It had failed, just lie every other girl had.

The candles gave a shadowy view of Percy's handiwork now tossed around the floor in destructive manner.

"Jason? Hello Grace?" Percy nudged him slightly, Jason looked up half stunned half annoyed.

"What?"

"I asked you if you have a crush, Piper seems to be interested in you a lot lately?"

"No! No of course not." He sighed and searched his friends face for disappointment but only found cheerful beauty, "I have a secret."

"Secrets come with a price." Percy said automatically.

Jason just sighed and put his glasses back on, he stalled adjusting them to a comfortable spot and then stalled by staring past Percy.

"This ones free." Jason swallows his fear along with a dose of reality.

He's needed to tell Percy for a long time, since he realized actually. He's been keeping it off for months now, but if Percy asks him one more time if he has a crush on a girl he's going to get decapitated.

So he turns away from Percy and focuses all his attention at the far wall.

"Percy I-I like boys." His voice came out a stuttering mess and he had to force away the urge to runaway.

"You... You're... Gay?" Percy asked tentatively, Jason could almost hear the screeching halt in his voice.

"Yeah. Listen I'm sorry I didn't tell yo-" But before Jason could finish he was torn from his seat and landed roughly on the floor.

For a minor second he thought Percy had punched him, actually punched him.

But then he felt Percy arms wrap around him and a muffled voice broke the silence. Percy either said 'Thanks' or 'Sausage' it was a mix up between the two.

Relief concurred Jason's thought process and his heart won out, he held Percy as tight as he could and let the rest of the world fall the trash.

Acceptance was all that mattered in that moment. Because Percy didn't hate him, and they were going to stay best friends.

"Thank you Jase," Percy smiled as he finally pulled away, "For telling me."

Jason's heart raced his voice as he scrambled for words, his thought process trailed behind slowing down at the sudden contact of the two boys hands.

At length Jason tore his gaze away from the touching hands to the dark haired boys stormy eyes.

"Thanks for listening."

It wasn't the surprise that knocked Percy off his feet, no he had almost expected Jason being gay. It was the complete joy he felt when the words were said outloud.

If you were the ask him he wouldn't be able to describe the delicate happiness escaping his lungs.

It was also the need to be closer, Percy couldn't really explain this one either, but he jst wanted to be closer to Jason.

So that's what he did, he jumped on Jason as soon as the initial stun.

Once they were sitting again Percy smiled ear to ear and bounced a thousand questions.

"So.. Do you have a crush? Oh my gods is it Leo? I will-"

"Fuck no!" Jason screeched laughing along with his best friend, "That's twisted Perce. Plus he has a total straight streak."

"Straight streak? Do I have one?" Percy leaned forward and accidentally knocked over his half built kingdom of schoolwork.

"You? I don't kno-" He paused looked at Percy for a second and continued, "Yeah I think you do. I mean you really like this Annabeth Chase."

Percy's mind did a quick double take to make sure he had mentioned his latest crush. A slow unidentified spark died out in Percy's chest, "That makes sense."

The room echoed in it's despair, now truly dark. The boys fell into an uncommon silence.

Percy's mind was running a thousand miles an hour, time and space seemed to break for a moment and the world felt black with disappointment.

He didn't know exactly why he hated it, why he wanted to be back in Jason's arms. But he didn't have time to figure it out.

The lights broke the intolerable stretch that had pulled through.

"Damn." Jason ran a hand through his perfect hair.

"Food?" Percy asked standing up and kicking away his homework,

"Food." Jason answered, but in reality he didn't want to eat he didn't want anything else. He was completely content with sitting in silence and watching Percy's features change as he accepted Jason for who he was.

Regardless he stood up and joined Percy at the mini fridge.


	3. Part Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lets walk back  
> To a time before boys   
> Smiles melted heart  
> And pain brought sparks   
> Lets walk back   
> To a time when you   
> Didn't disappear

Part Three:

Jason couldn't quiet tell you when he started thinking about Percy that way. He wasn't really sure when Percy became more than just a friend.

In his mind at least.

Percy's form danced in the waves below him, his hair was wet and his smile bright. This was by far the best Percy, the self couscous Percy who just forgets and rips his shirt off anyway, the shy boy who smiles so bright it hurts, the usually insane dark hair matted down by the salt water.

It was Jason's favourite Percy, and honestly probably the reason Jason thought about those things.

"Coming in Grace?" They were just fourteen and yet Percy was still as immature as ever. To be blunt Jason thought it was endearing, his immature side did at least.

Jason didn't really remember what it was like to be so innocent so enchantingly young. He didn't remember his childhood, and for as long as he remembers he was just as a adult as his adopted parents, Andrew and Ashley Rome.

As far as he's concerned he has to be.

He remembered telling Percy for the first time that he didn't like girls, it felt like ages ago, so much had happened since that innocent night in the dark.

So much had changed. Except for Percy, Percy stayed the same through it all.

Maybe that's why Jason liked him so much, he was the only constant in Jason's life. Maybe it was just teenage hormones.

Whatever it was struck again when Percy called him Grace, by his last name. His real last name. Not Rome, or Terrier or Falk. No Percy didn't think much of Jason's Foster parents, not even much of his new adopted parents.

So Jason was a Grace.

"You think I'm getting in that? Percy it's like five degrees out! You not supposed to swim in March!" It was pointless, if Percy wanted to swim Percy was going to swim, whether it be the middle of March or not.

"Scared-y cat!" He called splashing water in Jason's general direction.

"Fuck off!"

Percy's smile reached his eyes and his cheeks tinted red at the cussing, Percy might be immature but he didn't cuss.

And for a moment Jason didn't know where the earth began and he stopped because he would do anything for that goddamn smile.

"What? You scared of my fucking naughty fucking words?" He asked savagely taking advantage of the plot to see that smile grow.

No Jason didn't know why he thought of Percy like that, or when it began, but for a split second he didn't care, he didn't want it to ever end. As long as he can be the reason for that smile he would endure all of it.

***

They were standing to close again, Jason's heart was pounding in his ears. It meant nothing to Percy, the slight touch of there arms, the easy smile Percy flung around.

But to Jason it was the world. The little pieces making his life tolerable.

The earth shattering smile,

the sweet comments,

the small touches.

Percy Jackson shouldn't have been the center of a fourteen year old's life but he was Jason's everything.

Jason Grace shouldn't be so dumb to fall in love with a straight boy, but here they were.

"Perce?" Jason asked pocketing an unpaid pack of cigarettes.

"Jace." Percy answered glaring devilishly at Jason's now full pocket.

"Do you ever think about Annabeth and you?"

"You mean... Like dating?"

"Don't be so simple, I mean do you ever wank to her you bloody fool."

Time slowed for a split second, the question had been stinging Jason's mind for months now. He knew it was going to hurt when Percy told him yes. He knew it was going to hurt even worse if Percy went into detail.

But this is what most fourteen year old's talk about isn't it?

And Jason wasn't going to stop Percy just because he was gay, That isn't right, it isn't fair to Percy.

Se he braved his emotions and let the question slip between his numb lips.

"To be honest I don't." Percy was blushing harder than ever and frowning slightly, "I know I should, being fourteen and all. But I just- I can't."

Jason caught his breath and almost gasped outloud.

The relief clouded his minds eye and before he could rethink he asked, "You can't what? Wank or jus' wank to Annabeth?"

"Uh... To Annabeth I guess." He was staring down at the floor and his ears were red like fire.

They stepped out of the store, without paying but the clerk didn't notice, to busy on the phone.

They walked down the beach to a private (More private at least) area and Jason pulled out a cigarette.

His lungs burned at the intake but he took another drag anyway.

Percy glared at him so he blew the smoke in his face.

"I hate it when you smoke."

"I hate it when you talk to me about it."

A silence felt heavy between them, it felt like hours or perhaps days before Percy finally spoke.

"Who do you wank to?" His voice was cracked in places and hollow in others.

"No one." Jason answered honestly. It was the truth but it still sounded bitter on his tongue.

"Why not?"

"Because I it's not like I can wank to a boy." He sighed taking another drag of his cigarette, "I mean I can but all the boys we know pretty much hate me."

"I don't hate you." Percy said incredulously.

Jason forced a slow smile trying to hide the churning sensation in his chest.

"Are you saying I should wank to you Perce?"

Percy's eyes went wide and his mouth fell open. His cheeks flushed and recolored red within seconds.

"N-no! Of course not- I mean that's- you would- you can-"

"Calm down Jackson I was kidding."

That didn't make Percy calm down, if anything it got him redder.

In a desperate attempt to redeem his actions Percy said, "Why don't we go swimming?"

"Your fucking insane. It's March Jackson."

***


	4. Part Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Please excuse the fact that this chapter is like two words*  
> ____  
> Sweet as summer wind   
> Icy as winter nights  
> His smile broke hearts  
> His heart never lied

Part Four:

Percy liked Jason's new house. The Rome's were great people, I mean they would be if they hadn't adopted Jason.

It's not like Percy didn't want Jason to be adopted it's that he wanted Thalia to finally come get her baby brother.

Either way Jason's new place was pricey, he had all the video games a kid could want, and a nice set up to play them on.

But neither boy liked video games so they spent the afternoon lazing around his room fetching for ideas.

Jason sat on his desk with the window open and screen torn off so he could smoke, and Percy sat beside him trying to catch the scent of smoke before it drifted away.

Percy didn't smoke, but he had begun associating the scent of smoke with Jason. So it was comforting.

The room had turned quiet after a rash argument about whether or not Percy put to much syrup on his waffles.

As per usual Jason was much to suborn to break the silence himself so Percy did it for him, "Sometimes I think about boys you know."

It wasn't what he had wanted to say, he didn't even remember thinking about it before it slipped his lips.

But as soon as his voice hit the surface he knew it was a lie.

He didn't think about boys, he thought about Jason.

of course he thought about Jason, they were best friends after all.

So he wrote it off for later and continued speaking, "I mean, I don't know. You can think someones aesthetically beautiful without actually liking them right?" His worst fears were breathing air. But air only made them worse.

He realized a little to late what he had actually said, but by then Jason was already answering.

"No. I don't think so." He turned a keen eye on Percy and frailly blew smoke in his face,

"Why?"

"I've just been thinking. How am I supposed to know I don't like boys? I could be bi, maybe I like girls and boys and just don't know it ya know?" He began rambling heatedly. His thoughts exploding across the fresh silence that wrapped around them.

He was breathing quickly, in out, in out, in in in.

He couldn't breath anymore and his mind was going blurry.

He hadn't just said that he hadn't just said tha-

Jason took a hold of his chin in one strong hand and held him together.

Then they were kissing, slow and easy at first mostly just Jason.

Percy's world tilted, a sudden jolt of fear and excitement mixed with his blood.

But then Percy was kissing back and it was bliss and it was fire and it was over to soon.

"You okay?" Jason asked faces a breath apart.

"Mhh." Percy felt numb, and afire, and cold, and stupid, and like a million bucks.

"Did you like that?"

"Why'd you do it?" Percy asked trying to stop the glory rising in his chest.

"Well, you were having a bit of a freak out. I thought that maybe kissing a boy would help. Did it?"

"Mhh." Percy caught a hold of himself in the nick of time and flew backwards.

No.

No.

No.

No.

His mind was turning around in circles wasting space.

"That never fucking happened. That didn't! Don't you da-"

"Straight streak." Jason said taking a big breath then taking a drag, "Fuck heterosexuality and all it's complications." The last part was to low for Percy to hear but it made Jason chuckle anyway.

Jason was cracking on the inside. But he knew Percy needed him to be strong and compassionate. So he disconnected and pretended not to be eternally dying.

"It never happened Perce. I promise."

Percy didn't smile, but his eyes were shinning. 

Jason didn't scream but his soul was breaking.


	5. Part Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He giggled with Ghosts long before his time
> 
> Kissed boys and played on the swings
> 
> Screwed up? Yes he was
> 
> Hands lost in hair and hearts beating as one
> 
> He giggles with the ghosts long before his time
> 
> Screwed up? Yes he was
> 
> Thank you guys, hope you liked this short fic! I'll be writing more Jercy soon!
> 
> Goodbye for now.
> 
> ~ Arai Elijah

Part Five:

The room was achingly happy, in total contrast to the sly looks Percy was giving him.

Anger looked murderous on Percy's skin, cold and frightful. Like realizing it's to late to back away from the edge.

Hate seeped through every one of Jasons' limbs, creating a led like sensation.

Usually it only took a couple days for the boys to get over their differences, but this fight was a startling switch in the routine.

Three weeks.

Jason was still very confused as to what he had done wrong and Percy was utterly pissed. Not nescarrily at Jason, but more at himself.

For letting his mind wander, for letting his heart beat to fast, for letting his stare linger at length.

It was exhausting but he kept to it, until he couldn't anymore. He couldn't handle the sinking feeling when Jason wasn't looking back, couldn't handle the anxious rush when he was.

It made his blood boil over with anger, his mind crash with anxiety.

So he growled at his best friend and glared until they were properly out in the cold before sneering something unkind and fighting back in forth.

Without realizing it Percy stepped over the limit with a nasty "Whore" whispered under his breath.

The alley they found themselves in was dark and empty to the point where Jason was allowed to cry.

"Fuck you Perce!" Jason had yelled tears falling helplessly to his warm cheeks, "Fuck you.."

His words broke with a sob as his world crashed down around him.

This was nothing like the Percy he knew, this was not how it was supposed to be.

Yet here they were, fighting in an empty. It wasn't good, it was horrible in fact, but it was the only time Percy allowed himself to talk to Jason. So he took full advantage and let the anger and hope take over his lips.

"Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!" Percy screamed back, he was barely keeping the tears down himself, "You fucking freak! You ignorant faggot!" His words crumbled in his throat and his eyes bolted open.

Jason stopped crying, barely, and stared up at his best friend.

"Get the fuck out," He whispered coldly, "Get the fuck out of here Percy."

But Percy had been a stone, unable to move, unwilling to ask forgiveness.

His heart was beating against his rib cage, and his mind was falling apart.

He hadn't.

He wouldn't have.

Not that.

Not like that.

Jason's eyes were cold and unforgiving, his breath came shallow and heartless. His cheeks were pink in the lazy light, his glasses catching the rays.

He was beautiful.

But Percy wasn't supposed to think boys were beautiful. He wasn't supposed to think Jason was beautiful.

"I'm sorry. Please. Fuck Jason I'm sorry!" His voice came out ragged and tough with tears.

"Why? What the fuck did I do? Why are we fighting, who the hell started it? Why do you hate me all the sudden? I love you Percy, and whether it be platonic or not it's love and I can't fucking deal with this anymore, I can't handle it! So why the fuck are we standing in an alley fighting?" Jason couldn't quiet fight the tears that accompanied his voice.

Percy had been shot, he could feel the wound in his chest, he could feel the blood on his hands.

"I don't want to do this." Percy whispered stepping closer. They were a breath apart and his heart was jumping into his throat.

"Do what?" Jason asked hoarsely, his eyes had cleared again, his glasses crooked.

"Fucking Grace." Percy whispered and closed the gap between them.

This kiss was so much different from the first time, it was slow and long. He could smell the smoke on Jason's breath, he could feel the heat in his hands.

"I don't understand." Jason murmured against Percy's lips after a moment.

"Just forgive me. I'm sorry, I'm gay, I'm freaking out a little, and most importantly, I think I'm having a heart attack."

"Does this mean what I think it means?"

"That I like you. Yes." Percy smiled and because Jason didn't back away leaned in and kissed him again.

"I was going to say that were talking again. But this works to."


End file.
